funny Rockinrolla and a rockin’ recipe

There’s this ad that came on television during American Idol last night: a long-armed, orange muppet creature, Hungry, tempts a dieter with trays of cupcakes, cookies, pizza, when she’s just trying to relax on the couch or whatever. As in, Hungry won’t leave you alone! The Hungry Monster offers the junk food with wagging eyebrows and a flourish, and the willful dieter ignores him disdainfully, and various painful-looking things befall Hungry.

Rockinrolla: Are you KIDDING me? I would LOVE that!! Having that thing follow me around and offer me pizza all the time! I’d be all, Why sure, thank you! And they’re all trying to crush it and kill it and stuff!! That’s crazy!


I concocted a super-tasty veggie-tastic dinner last night, if I do say so myself:

Jamz Pinto Beans and Polenta

1. Rinse 2 cups dried pinto beans well. Soak beans in 8 cups hot (I used scalding) water for 6-8 hours. Drain and rinse again.

2. Bring to a boil 5 cups of water, 3 cups’ worth of dried veggie boullion cubes, and 1 can of cilantro and lime Rotel. Simmer for 1 1/2 hours total, with lid tilted. Add a good slosh of olive oil, 2 tablespoons nutrional yeast, and 1 teaspoon kelp granules.

3. In last 15 minutes or so of beans cooking, chop one large onion. Reserve half to top dinners. Saute one entire package of vegan chorizo with other half of chopped onion until onion is soft.

4. Follow instructions on package to make yellow corn meal mush. My recipe was so easy, and I’d never done it before: You just bring water to a boil, whisk in the corn meal and salt, and cook until thick. I added a big hunk of smart balance margarine. I’m sure this would also be good over rice, pasta, or potatoes of some variety.

5. Serve: Layer polenta, beans, cheese (if desired), sausage, and a sprinkling of chopped onions. I added chopped sundried tomatoes to mine, and Daddy J added some hot sauce.

It was fabulous.

adoption update

We went down again to see the (potential) birthparents, and once again it was great. We really do have a good relationship with them; we genuinely like them a lot and they seem to like us a lot. F and J still seem very committed and sure of their choice. F is tired of being pregnant (been there, done that) and looking forward to some future events she’s planned after the birth.

We’ve had good talks about the kind of contact and updates they’d like after the birth, and have expressed to them emphatically that if they ever want more contact, to let us know. We ate again at a relaxed, pleasant restaurant on the water and hung out for awhile. We talked some more about why they had chosen us, our lifestyles, how excited we are, and our own labor and birth experiences.

So. Yes. Things could change, things could go awry in some way, but right now, F and Rainbow appear perfectly healthy and it looks like Rainbow will be coming home with us. His due date is March 3. He’s a good size and the OB said it wouldn’t be shocking if he came a little early, although he’ll probably come around his due date.

Daddy J and I are just bowled over with this whole thing, still. They are so pleasant and fun and conscientious, just caring and nice people, and it’s amazing to us that the plan is for us to parent their baby.

milky haze

The cold was our pride, the snow was our beauty. It fell and fell, lacing day and night together in a milky haze, making everything quieter as it fell, so that winter seemed to partake of religion in a way no other season did, hushed, solemn.

~~~~~Patricia Hampl, 1981

NOT that we’ve been getting any impressive amounts of snow around here.  We’d love a nice heavy snow around here, but I’m in a different sort of milky haze.

The pumping totally sucks.
(Sorry – I could NOT resist that.)

But, yeah, I HATE pumping. At this point, following Lenore’s protocol, I have stopped with the birth control pills and started with the pumping, continuing the Domperidone (don’t EVEN ASK what a drag it was ordering from an online pharmacy – cheaper, yes, but the meds were a week late and I had to scramble to find some for the interim days) and adding the herbs blessed thistle and foengreek.

And am getting a whopping 1/8 teaspoon or so with each pumping.

***smacks forehead loudly***

AND YET I will persevere. I ordered a supplemental nursing system from Medela. You poke the soft, thin tube into baby’s mouth while he’s nursing and then adjust the flow, so, as he nurses, he’s getting formula or whatever from the bottle. And, hopefully, your milk supply increases as you go.

Which leads me to this question:

What’s the best formula? Presuming no allergies or special dietary needs?

Our boys were nursed exclusively, except when they were babysat, when they got whatever formula was free or I had a coupon for. Taste or nipple confusion were never an issue, and I didn’t really research formula because they had it so rarely. But Rainbow will have a lot of formula, at least at the beginning. I bought some Dr. Brown’s bottles that claim they reduce colic, which sounded good.

childish thoughts

I read this on this blog, Missing Eliana, and loved it.  It was written as a eulogy by Linn Keller, who recently lost someone close to him.

It’s just so beautiful and tender, and is making me cry this morning.

(I’m a child, too.)

I am a child.img_3558-21
I stand alone on the playground in the gathering dusk.
I look around and I am sad, for my friend has been called home by a Wise and Loving Parent.
I know this — I know the Parent is both wise and loving, and I know my friend is safe and warm at home — and yes, I know I will see my friend again, in the dawning of the new day.
But I am a child.
A child understands one thing:
A child does not understand later, or perhaps, or tomorrow; a child exists in the moment, and I am a child.
I will see my friend again in the dawning of the new day, but to a child, tomorrow is forever, an eternity.
When one of our own is called in by that Wise and Loving Parent, we look around the playground and cry for them, for there is still light enough to play.  There is still light, there is time, but my friend is gone, and I must wait.

                                                             ~~~~Linn Keller

Saturday morning

The scene: Mama Jamz’s bedroom. Breastpump accessories are scattered about the bed, new accessory parts are still in plastic wrappers. Mama Jamz is on the bed with the laptop and a cup of coffee, flavored with coconut coffee mate. Enter Rockinrolla, stage left.

Rockinrolla: What is all this stuff?

Mama Jamz: Breastpump stuff.  I was going to start pumping this morning, but I don’t have all of the parts.

Rockinrolla: (grimaces in horror and disgust) Grody… If I was a girl, I would NOT like that.  I mean, a breast pump???

Mama Jamz: Yeah, tell me about it.


We had a very lovely dinner last night with one of Daddy J’s friends from college, who married her then-boyfriend after we met them, like, fourteen years ago. It’s a funny thing how, in my case, you just spend an evening with people, let fourteen years pass, and then see them again, and they’re still really fun and easy to talk to.

They hadn’t known about Wardie, and it’s strange now to both introduce him and explain that he’s no longer alive in one breath. A weird summary. And it’s very hard to try to get across the whole journey that we’ve had; to try to explain how it’s been horrific, but also beautiful in ways, and that we know he’s fine, and that he’s still with us, and not just in a metaphorical sense, and that he’s doing his own thing, too, and that sometimes we do have doubts about all of that, but mostly we don’t.


Rockinrolla has a basketball game here in a little bit, which translates to the fact that I need to haul my lazy ass into the shower and become presentable. He just came in and petitioned for an omelet, and I countered with a Toast youself a bagel and have a yogurt; Mama’s cozy.

funny exchanges

Fishmaster, to Rockinrolla: Do you know what chitlins are?

Rockinrolla: Um, aren’t they little dogs?


Rockinrolla, displeased with his falafel dinner: Mama, what are falafel made out of?

Mama Jamz: Chick peas.

Rockinrolla: You know, that explains a lot.


In other news, it appears that Meat Day may have resulted in the Fishmaster contracting a nasty case of food poisoning. We suspect the chitlins, or else the hog brains. We’ll see how this unfolds; every student in the middle school was required to take a bite of every dish…

***edited to add*** The Fishmaster made a full recovery. He skipped dinner entirely with a sour, crampy stomach, but had an oatmeal chocolate chip cookie before bedtime and slept all night, and had a normal breakfast and is all perky this morning. Maybe his body was just protesting the intestines and brains he ate. I think my body would object to that treatment.

nervous little ball of stress


Yes, everything is going fine. The boys are wonderful, the adoption is on target, with just a couple of minor-ish bumps, Daddy J and I are great.

There are no problems here, Mama.

But, yeah, there’s plenty to fret about. I woke up at 4am and was this close to getting up for the day, because I was wide awake and couldn’t get my brain to shut up, then listened to a meditation cd and was able to zone out again.

Rockinrolla and the Fishmaster are still being really fun and getting along together. It’s so much like the old days, when they were like a couple of playful little bear cubs, only now they’re cracking me up with Mom Jeans impersonations and challenging me with questions I can’t answer.

Why does stuff burn? Why only dry stuff?

Why does the United States have a national debt? Who are we borrowing money from? Why are we borrowing money and still lending it out?

What’s up with Seal’s face?

I’m about to go solicit for the Habitat for Humanity auction, which… shudder… I DREAD doing in this economy. But, okay, I’ll soldier on. I have donation requests to hand to shopkeepers so I don’t have to deliver a long sales pitch. Gughhh. Wish me luck.


It would now be Thursday morning. I survived soliciting the town merchants with only a few cold pricklies. A couple of the shops are closing, so I skipped them entirely, although I was disappointed that my favorite shop, also closing, had a big huge sale advertised, yet was locked up.

Today is Meat Day at the Fishmaster’s school. His many efforts to bring in squirrel filets = BITTER FAILURE. Poor boy. But, go me!, I threw together a sack of exotic meat-treats in, like, fifteen minutes this morning. Homemade crab cracker spread, a can of sardines, and a can of smoked oysters, with a brand new box of fancy crackers. Great job, pantry!

I’m about to go get my hair cut. I was going to do the bob I’ve had before where it’s longer in the front than the back, but Daddy J professed his love of long hair (sigh) which for now is winning out over my burning hatred of drying it and dealing with it. I was able to get an appointment yesterday with my very favorite hairdresser, Linda, and am getting another helix cut. I’m not entirely sure it’s all that different than a regular old layered cut, but Linda is a big fan, and believes it “cuts curls in.” So, we’ll be keeping the length (a little past my shoulders) and going for shaggy waves.

Also, I have to solicit donations in the town Linda’s salon is in (yucky, yuck, yuck) and try to breezily deal with that one shop owner who JUST WON”T let you leave her shop without buying some ridiculously overpriced item. (Oh, justlookatmy great sale stuff! These $250 jeans are marked down to ONLY 90 BUXX!) Last time I ended up buying tights just to get out of there. Also, I’m going out to lunch with my mom, so, Bonus.

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