favoritism

He’s brilliant.

This whole I prefer Daddy to Mama and will lunge at him and shower him with kisses Thing is having its desired effect: I’ve had to step it up a notch.

O, the smiles, the singing, the patient repetitive book-reading, the 3:30 am snuggling – all because I really want to be his favorite. Which, yes, is very immature and self-centered, but there you go. I want me some gooshy kisses and baby lunges toward me, too. I think he thinks of me as his vehicle, his feeder, his needs-fulfiller, which is great, but I’d like him to be wild about me.

Daddy J has one up on me, though – I think the whiskers are a big part of it. He reported that Rainbow really likes to have the silky top of his head rubbed with them. It may also just be a Man Thing (the deeper voice, the height, the overall bigger-ness) because Rainbow’s crazy about Papa, too. When he comes over, Rainbow fusses to be picked up IMMEDIATELY and heaven help us if Papa does not oblige.

I secretly comfort myself with the idea that he thinks of himself as just an offshoot of me, since I’m the primary caregiver – like, he doesn’t really differentiate between himself and me. Of course I do all these things for him, and he doesn’t need to be all affectionate toward me to make me do it, because we are not separate. But I’m skeptical of this mumbo-jumbo, and still very jealous.

I may have to resort to sweets. I gave him a little dab of nutella this morning and he loved it.

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Melissa
    Nov 23, 2009 @ 18:11:23

    I had this exact same problem with Camden! He loved me, but the minute Brad walked in the house, I was nothing but chopped liver. It didn’t change until we went on vacation for 5 days without him. Now Camden clings to me constantly and lunges for me! I think the favoritism towards Daddy has a lot to do with Mommy being the primary caregiver. I was thrilled when Camden started favoring me. Now we are working on building his independence again. Slowly, but surely.

  2. Jennifer Jones
    Nov 24, 2009 @ 05:02:11

    I lunge for Nutella. Maybe that will work. 🙂

  3. thisbumpyjourney
    Nov 24, 2009 @ 14:52:22

    I am happy to note that he actually fussed to go BACK to me yesterday, which was AWESOME.

    (yes, yes, yes, be careful what you wish for, Mama…)

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